Season Six Finale
This gyre? Well it isn’t NOT widening, pal.
For the season finales of both seasons Four and Five I did a whole recap, but unless I can find an archivist who desperately needs a new job, that seems a lot of work that I already did by writing Tabs every day. Also, creating the recap makes me feel deranged and reading it makes you feel deranged, and we’re all pretty close to the edge already. So for a full recap please see the archive. Instead, what I want to do today is just highlight a few favorites.
Season Six in Politics
Putin on the Blitz: The season started with Russia’s invasion of Ukraine, and a posting day so bad it probably killed the Take Tree.
Bad News About Henry Kissinger: He’s still alive.
Big Ben Bongs for Boris: A British government Tabs that has no American equivalent.
The Environmental Powerlessness Agency: “Grandpa President Joe Biden said: ‘Gee I wish those fellas hadn’t’a done that! They’re good boys though, got their whole lives ahead of them.’ It is unclear who or what he was referring to.”
Season Six in Cyberbullying
Season Six in Trends
Morbin’ Monday: The whole orb was Morbin’.
Sentience? In This Economy? AI was everywhere this season, and maybe she wasn’t sentient but my, she was yar.
Humanity's Flop Era: I tried to write a new joke here but failed.
Season Six in Crypto
Stablecoins: Neither Stable nor Coins: I put on my hyper-realistic latex Matt Levine mask and explained what an algorithmic stablecoin is, so you could understand why the Terra collapse was “some of the darkest comedy available right now.”
Season Six in Literary References
All Across the Alien Nation: April?…
The Elonphant and the Snake: A whole Tabs about Elon Musk buying Twitter in the form of an extended riff on “The Little Prince” for reasons that escape me now.
All Quiet On The Great Gatsby: “This gyre? Well it isn’t NOT widening, pal.”
Season Six in Crabs
The Lottery: Today in Crabs scuttled sideways into the spotlight this season, but I think this was the best one. Also it’s a good literary reference/Today in Crabs crossover post.
Season Six in Puns
KHAN HEIR: Joe Khan was named the new Times editor in chief, giving us the best pun this season.
Season Six in Tragedy
What Are You Willing To Do? After the massacres in Buffalo, Laguna Woods, and most of all Uvalde, I wondered what any of us can do about it. I still don’t know what to do.
Season Six in Paywalls
A Walk in the Woods: I took subscribers on a walk in the woods with Sammy.
The Gang Learns About Digital Security for Activists: Reader and Discord member @Here_Max ran a live workshop on personal digital security, which we later posted outside the paywall.
What Was Your Worst Idea? An old man reminisced about the ‘90s.
Thanks to Tabs Senior Managing Editor for Graphics Alison Headley for nearly all of the fine photoshop work you see above and in the rest of the posts. Thanks to everyone in the subscriber Discord for sharing their tabs and for being the best newsletter themed community that exists, and thanks to you for reading. See you in a few weeks for Season Seven!