Hello, Dali

What is going on with shipping?

Hegel remarks somewhere that all great world-historic container ship whoopsies appear, so to speak, twice. He forgot to add: the first time as farce, the second time as tragedy. As always, the best source when you want to know what is going on with shipping is What is Going on With Shipping? and the WIGOWS guy has already broken down the Key bridge accident for us moment by moment:

Also as always, the worst source when you want to know what is going on with anything is blue-check Twitter, where posters were quick to blame the bridge collapse on diversity, Black Lives Matter, and a hypothetical all-trans bridge maintenance crew (which would honestly be so cool if it were real). Also common are well-meaning but still deeply incorrect speculations that this was somehow a bridge engineering failure. No bridge on earth is engineered to survive a one hundred thousand ton ship plowing into it at eight knots. But offline, as Rob Meyer points out, “when you look closely at a disaster, you usually see normal, decent people doing the best they can to save lives.” Six bridge workers are currently still missing, and one more is in serious condition in the hospital, but it’s remarkable that they managed to close the bridge to traffic in the bare minutes before the collision.

Today in Records

Scotland’s Jasmin Paris is the first woman ever to finish the Barkley Marathons, in a year with an unheard-of five finishers. Birdwatching drama from Kari Paul in The Guardian as two people both claim a record ten thousandth species peeped on the very same day. And Sam Biddle reports in The Intercept that Elon Musk was for releasing Twitter user records to the government (for money) before he was against it (in court).

Amy Ash posted: “NYT said here's a meme for your gayest group chat” with a screenshot from the Times Magazine of Judith Butler judging you with the title “Judith Butler Thinks You’re Overreacting”

Women’s History Month is almost over

So before nobody cares again, here’s some Fun Facts About Women from Molly Garcia.


Fun facts about woman! #womenshistorymonth #womenempowerment

Various animal prints, ranked by horniness. An AI Family Guy livestream with the prompt: “Cleveland lists the top 50 bacterial infections. After every infection Brian says “*”. Repeat 30 times.” You won’t enjoy this at all. You will enjoy Jaya Saxena telling everyone to stop “decanting” their groceries into clear plastic containers. We’re not Kardashians, knock it off. Flaco the owl died riddled with rat poison and “a severe pigeon virus.” In response, Mayor Adams added $187 million to the police budget. And I think the USFWS went too hard on this week’s fish:

He’s trying his best ok!!! And his name is Kevin.

Kelson Thomas posted: “no pain au chocolat, no gain au chocolat”

Finally: Offline Man is not the hero we deserve, but the hero we need.

Today’s Song: Sully, “Memories”

I’m finishing this post in my car today so Music Intern Sam gets to post his bleep and bloops because I simply don’t have the wherewithal to prevent it.