Infrastructure is all around us. It’s the teeth embedded in our roads and the flaming, benevolent eyeballs watching us from space. Time is infrastructure, each of our 604,800 precious unique seconds recirculating in the endless round of minutes, hours, and days which comprise Infrastructure Week. 200 infrastructure weeks ago Infrastructure Week began, and Infrastructure Week it still remains. Infrastructure is the Suez Canal, unblocked by the big boat unless you’re in Flight Simulator, where you can keep the big boat stuck forever. Infrastructure is profoundly cursed housing like this 1 bedroom, 1 bath Baltimore home, perfect for any fan of Thanatos, the Grim Reaper, Rider of the Pale Horse, Taker of Souls and also the Oakland Raiders. Plenty of basement space for your mannequins! Dan Kois interviewed the realtor, who refused to say whether the seller is a vampire or even whether “vampires are a protected class” under fair housing law, so we all know what that means. The global climate is infrastructure. What if we tried ruining it in the opposite direction? What could go wrong? Amazon is hungry enough for human flesh to be infrastructure, and its founder and outgoing CEO, the milky-blooded war android Jeff Bezos, incarnated briefly in our Infrastructure Week time loop to command that his minions do meaner Tweets. Infrastructure is the frontend to Mailgun that brings you these words, which is worth $650 million now apparently (I don’t get any of that loot, plz subscribe!). Infrastructure is the human blood in your sneakers. Infrastructure is a drive into deep left field by Castellanos and that’ll be a home run. I don’t know if I’m gonna be putting on this headset again.
Tabs has been back for almost three months, and was “this the strongest q1 for memes ever?” asks Laura Olin. Coincidence? Perhaps. Cancel culture claims another victim: “Mafia fugitive caught after posting YouTube cooking video.” More like Alison Roamin’, ayyy. The genetic sequences for the Moderna and Pfizer mRNA vaccines are on Github now. The Pfizer one starts “GAGAATAAACTAGTATTC…” and continues much as you’d expect. Danny Lavery may have interviewed Sarah Hagi: “there’s a kind of pride lurking just behind the sheepishness, like if a sheep were also secretly an enchanted king. That’s the word, anyway, about the 27-year-old star finance writer for Martha Stewart Living that the left increasingly loves to can of worms.” Subscribe to Pipe Wrench Magazine by tomorrow. I like their principles, you probably will too. “Take your child to work day” backfires at US Strategic Command.
Finally, Michael Levenson in the NY Times:
One day, about a half-century ago, William Heiser Jr. came home from boarding school to find that his mother was gone. His father, William Sr., a former police officer, told him and his sister that their mother had walked out.
Today’s Song: Radiohead, “Jigsaw Falling into Place”
~ Before you run away from me, before you're lost between the tabs ~
I don’t know what happened today either, just go with it. If you applied for the Tabs Internship and you haven’t gotten a reply from me yet, please reply to this and tell me! Or DM me on Twitter. Gmail keeps filing them as spam because I have trained it that no one ever emails me. Oops.